Admit it. Club Penguin’s Private Server would have been cooler.
Zaim was right when he said it sucked that I have my paper at 5pm while his was at 1pm. He was absolutely right. I just really want to finish that damn paper now, and the two others next week. Then fly to Lisbon. Then get all kinds of work done.
I was bored waiting, so I decided to post something here. NAH!
How did this all begin?
How did this happen to us?
How did this get so out of hand?
Why couldn’t we just talk it out?
Why couldn’t we just agree to disagree?
Why couldn’t we just be on the same page for each other, for once?
Since when did talking to each other become an obligation?
Since when did my topics of interest become a taboo to you?
Since when did seeing each other once every 3 months become too much?
Did I not try hard enough to fix us?
Did I not try hard enough to stop us from becoming strangers?
Did I not try hard enough to give you the appropriate, enough, or whatever space you needed?
Was I being stupid for trying for so long?
Was I being unreasonable for not wanting us to drift apart?
Was I being insane for constantly lowering my expectations of you?
I don’t know.
I can NOT wait to come here.
A place where (I hope) I can spend the whole day in isolation, with my books. All different kaaaainds of books.
Big books, small books, square books, rectangular books, new books, old books, colourful books, not-so-colorful books, heavy books, light books, thin books, and thick books.
And it’ll be so quiet.
But this man, whatever his motive, shouldn’t be tried and convicted in the press. We’re lawyers. We know that’s not how it’s supposed to work.” (Matthew Murdock, Daredevil)
This is it. The day before exams officially begin. Next week will be interesting. 4 papers with limited time to rest in between each. I’ve accepted that I will be very happy with a mere pass. Someone once told me I should aim for the stars, because even if I fail I’ll land on the clouds; but, I also adjust my expectations and stay grounded to reality.
Is a work-life balance actually possible? I find that difficult. When I was part of the committee, I realised I had to give my all, 100%. Not 50%, 75%, or even 99%. What’s the point if you don’t go all in, right? But giving your all in one thing, means putting close to no effort in something else. All that led me here, after a month’s plus worth of studying. Happy to get a mere pass, while plenty others are looking to get a 1st class. I thought I’d be pretty disappointed in myself for only wanting a pass, but I’m pretty comfortable now. That was the trade-off: to work with people, in exchange for good grades. I would give up good grades any day, for the chance to add value in people’s lives.
But it’s always a balancing act. Isn’t it?